I recieved the e-mail below from a young man named Miles. The subject of his e-mail was “I’m having problems getting it up”…he is having problems achieving an erection. Dr. Manpower’s diagnosis: sexual performance anxiety. Please see below:
My name is Miles and I’m 18 years old. My girlfriend and I just began having sex and I am having serious problems. I have a problem getting it hard or keeping it hard enough in order to put it in. I have had sex before, so I don’t know what it is. Do you think it could be me or is there something wrong that I don’t know about? I really want to be having sex with her but it is just really difficult getting me really hard and staying that way in order to have sex. Your advice would be much appreciated and I really hope that you can help me overcome this problem.
I am 99% sure that you have sexual performance anxiety, and not any physical problem. I’ve gone through this before. Performance anxiety comes from putting too much pressure on the situation, concentrating on your erection too much, and not relaxing enough and enjoying yourself.
You should also become as comfortable with your partner as possible, and communicate with her…explain to her that you are just nervous because you like her so much, and want to please her…she’ll probably think you’re cute for telling her this.
Sexual performance anxiety can become a cycle (let me know if my description of the situation is correct):
1. You realize that you cannot achieve a complete erection quickly, you panic, then you are completey unable to achieve an erection. No matter what you do, it doesn’t get hard. You give up on this first encounter, feeling worried and embarrased.
2. Next, you worry about it for a while, even obsess over it at times, and you want to prove to yourself that your erection still works. This places even more pressure on the situation. You are very anxious the next time you perform, and this causes you to fail to achieve an erection once again…by this time you are really embarrased, and your girl may even say something like “what’s wrong with you?”, or something along those lines….
3. Then the pressure, depression, obsession gets worse, and you start to think that something is physically wrong with you, and you begin looking into erectile dysfunction treatments…you also dread and are depressed by the idea that you may need Viagra to get an erection for the rest of your life….
Am I correct on my description of this? I told you, I’ve been there before, and it can become a vicious cycle…I have know exactly what it takes to mentally and physically overcome this anxiety.
I seriously doubt that you have E.D. Many people your age experience peformance anxiety for the first time and swear that they have erectile dysfunction. It happened to me when I was around 17-18, and to a number of my friends as well.
Besides my psychological technique to get over the sexual performance anxiety, my erection exercise routine will greatly help as well. These exercises can strengthen your erections to their fullest, so you will be more confident in your penis’s abilities. This will help alleviate some of the pressure on you to perform, and can help you overcome this problem quicker.
I also have a section of my guide that describes different ways to make a woman orgasm, including ways other than intercourse. If you can satisfy your lady before you even try intercourse, this will take off even more pressure.
I guarantee you that you’ll overcome this. How to overcome sexual performance anxiety is one section of my guide, an erection exercise routine is another section, and I dedicate another section to how to make a woman orgasm.
My guide, Mr. Manpower’s Guide to Overall Manhood Enhancement
, is available for download here: How to Overcome Sexual Performance Anxiety
. If you don’t get over this problem within 60 days, and if you don’t find your erections much stronger, I will give you 100% of your money back, direct to your credit card. Let me know if you have any more questions, and best of luck to you.
Have a good one!
The Ultimate Sex Guide for Men