What To Say To A Girl When You Can’t Get An Erection

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What to say to girl when you can't get it up

Not being able to get an erection with a new girl you’re dating is quite a common occurrence.

I can remember it happening with a number of girls over the years.

Sometimes I beat the problem, and got my erections back on track… other times it dragged out to long, tumultuous and embarrassing experience.

In the worst of cases, I never got to “redeem” myself with the girl, and she was forever the girl who thought David had erectile dysfunction…

Since those days, I’ve figured out how to get a rock hard erection on command, and overcome any mental block that gets in the way.

But back from experiencing those problems myself, from my conversations with women, and from receiving emails from men and women regarding the difficulties they are facing with this mental ED, I’ve learned about the situation – 360 degrees.

If you have difficulties getting an erection, then there are a few things you can tell a woman in order to keep her at ease, and help alleviate the pressure on your situation.

Part of the reason you are unable to get an erection with a new girl is because you are putting too much pressure on yourself.  It is also due to a lack of comfort, or connection, built between yourself and this new girl.

Discussing the situation with her, should erectile problems happen, will help accomplish both of these things.

1) Assure her that you are attracted to her.

Women will sometimes worry that they may not be attractive enough to turn you on. Tell her that you are very much attracted to her, that you are just nervous from how beautiful she is.

2) This has happened once before.

It’s not good to sound like she’s just another number, and you’re a male gigolo who gets it on on a daily basis, but do tell her it’s happened before… it’s not her. And that this doesn’t occur when alone (so she doesn’t think there’s a physical problem with your erection)… also, it’s happened once before, because if you say this has happened a bunch of times before, she may doubt your sexual abilities.

3) You are putting pressure on yourself, because you like her.

You really want to satisfy her. Due to this pressure on yourself, you can’t get it up.

4) Please be patient, and it will come around.

When this happened before (whether or not it’s true that it happened before), your erection came back to normal once you got comfortable with the girl. This will keep her at peace, and looking forward to the future — and once again, sure that there is no other hormonal or physical issue… or that you don’t find her sexy.

Obviously, you don’t want to shoot all of these things at her at once… use a combo of a couple maybe at most, whatever you feel comfortable saying. For instance, some of these, like number 3), would work much better if you’re in a relationship with the girl (or planning to get into a relationship)… you don’t want to tell a one night stand “you really like her” because you may creep her out… The others should work in that situation, though.

What to DO (ACTIONS) to Help Alleviate The Pressure, And Allow Your Arousal To Grow

giving her an orgasm before helps ED

Words help, but sometimes actions help even more.

The number one helpful thing you can do is to learn how to get her off orally. This will take a GIANT weight off of your shoulders = her satisfaction.

Tease her clitoris in a circular motion without touching it. Lick her labia, finger her upper wall. Get her VERY turned on before you pay full, direct attention to her clitoris.

When you finally “touch down” on the clit, start with down-to-up strokes, repeat the same motion, put some heavy pressure on the clit. Finger her upper wall (g-spot area) with a “come here” motion the entire time.

When she starts raising her pelvis off of the bed in extreme arousal, then start sucking hard on the clitoris, continuing the come here motion…

Before long she’ll be orgasming in your mouth.

And there you have it… her satisfaction. Now why worry about whether you can get an erection or not? Why worry about how long you are going to last during sex, or if she’ll have an orgasm?

And guess what? Lifting this weight off your shoulders will very likely be enough for you to be at ease, and get your erection.

Most Women Are Quite Understanding in This Regards… 

When it comes to being unable to get an erection, women, even quite young ones, are generally pretty understanding.

Women by nature are nurturing… caring.

Sure, there are some bad eggs… some that will be hard on you, and maybe make bratty statements if you can’t get an erection. I’ve had a few of those.

In this case, it’s more about them, than you. The fact you didn’t get an erection is a shock to their self-image and ego. They feel they weren’t hot enough, or whatever the case may be, and take it out on you.

And if your penis didn’t work with them? You saved yourself a bunch of headaches in the future. So thank your penis.


  • For more in-depth information on how to overcome this mental block to getting an erection, as well as physical things you can do to achieve harder erections, see here…

Have a good one!

-David Carreras aka Mr. Manpower
Mr. Manpower’s Guide to
Overall Manhood Enhancement

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