Mental erectile dysfunction (also known as sexual performance anxiety or psychological ED) can set off a whole chain of events that is hard to stop, and even harder to reverse. While mental erectile dysfunction is the main cause of erection issues in young men, it also effects men later on in life, for any number of reasons.
It generally starts off like this…
The majority of your post-pubescent life you’ve never had a problem getting an erection. Getting an erection is something you’ve never had to think about… it just happens. You wake up with hard erections, you get random erections throughout the day, you get hard every time you’re going to masturbate, and you may have had a girlfriend or two already, and with them, you’ve never had problems getting an erection… usually the opposite… keeping it down.
Then somewhere between 18 and 21 or so, give or take a year or two, you may begin a new relationship with someone. This someone may be very attractive to you, and you may want to impress them. The last thing in the world is you want her to think that you’re bad in bed (and you don’t want to believe you’re bad in bed, of course… it’s a signal of manhood, right?).
So then comes the sex. You get an erection during foreplay with no problem, you greatly anticipate the moment of action, and then somewhere during foreplay (or when putting on the condom), you lose your erection… what the hell is this? This has never happened before.
And then you get all in your mind, rather than in the situation, and enjoying the sex. And this is when the mental erectile dysfunction kicks in…
You keep trying to “turn yourself back on”, with a big concentration on your penis, rather than what arouses you. It’s too soft to put it in her, or if you do get it in, it feels like a tiny worm swimming in a smothering ocean… futile.
After some time you most likely give up, head down in shame…
You may try again — either that same day or on a later date — with the whole point to “test your erection”, and with this mentality, you will without a doubt not get an erection….
…the beginning of the negative cycle of this mental ED.
When you have mental erectile dysfunction you may feel a constant, or coming and going, depression, worry and low self-esteem. You now feel a major pressure — almost a life duty — to prove to yourself and most likely her that your erection works. This removes the joy of sex, which is a prerequisite to getting hard… sex is supposed to be fun, not something where your entire self-worth is on the line.
Unfortunately most things that guys hear when trying to solve this issue doesn’t help:
- “You’re too young to have this problem“…
- “Just be confident“
- “It’s ED caused by porn… stop watching porn”.
You may begin to fear that you have some rare physical issue (which you most likely don’t), or something else along those lines.
I’ve learned how to overcome mental erectile dysfunction once and for all… the problem you face is one almost every man faces at least once in his life.
I get several emails a week from young men who face issues getting an erection due to anxiety, and who are freaking out because they can’t get hard before sex… I myself had a problem when younger. And as I was saying, mental ED can hit a man at any stage in life… including when older, possibly when starting a new sexual relationship after having been with the same person for years (guilt can play a role as well).
All kinds of things can start the vicious cycle.
It’s better to prevent the vicious cycle of mental erectile dysfunction before it even starts, but if you’ve already experienced a couple of episodes, it can be reversed.
First off, don’t “just be confident” if that’s not how you really feel deep down… ADMIT YOU ARE ANXIOUS, don’t deny it. It’s a human reaction to be anxious before sex… once admitting the anxiety, once seeing it clearly for what it is… separate yourself from it, and just watch it. The act of viewing it, without judgement, weakens its power over you.
Also, much like finally diagnosing a disease, rather than ignoring it and letting it run amok in your system, you’ll learn how to treat it… and beat it.
Don’t rush… take your time. Some men rush to get an erection, rush to keep the erection, penetrate fast in order to not lose an erection… this is does more to promote your feelings of anxiety and fear.
Taking your time… having fun… and just concentrating on getting very horny and mentally aroused allows real, powerful arousing energy and blood circulation to spread throughout the body and into your erection.
This is not always the easiest problem to beat, but once you learn to beat ED in the mind, you beat it for good. For more info on how to beat this problem once and for all, see here: How To Overcome Psychological ED
No need for medication; it actually causes more harm than good.
Any questions you may have, I’m here.
-David Carreras aka Mr. Manpower
Mr. Manpower’s Guide to
Overall Manhood Enhancement
The Ultimate Sex Guide for Men… “male potency without drugs”
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