The female orgasm is complicated.
WAY more complicated than the male orgasm.
It’s damn near impossible for us NOT to have an orgasm during sex, or for women not to know how to get us off.
What you see is what you get with us. A penis.
You rub it up and down, for long enough, in almost ANY kind of way, and we’re going to cum…
NO… they had to be more complicated… NO… you can’t just thrust inside a female’s vagina and make her orgasm before or during your own climax. .
With SOME women, yeah… even a clueless virgin, can make them orgasm…
But with others, if not most… some know-how of the female anatomy is necessary for you to bring her to orgasm.
And if she’s NOT orgasming? Well… a few things may be happening… or not happening..
According to a Cosmo survey of 2,300 women, 57% of women have orgasms regularly during sex with their partner, while 43% do not.
And only 20% of women regularly get off during vaginal intercourse, even with clitoral stimulation! Something is wrong here, gents!
We need to fix this!
Some of the reasons listed as to why a woman isn’t having an orgasm with a partner (I guess this takes into consideration all forms of sex, and not just penetrative intercourse):
- 50% feel like they’re almost there, but can’t quite get over the edge.
- 38% aren’t getting enough clitoral stimulation
- 35% say it’s not the right kind of clitoral stimulation
- 32% are in their own head, or too worried about how they look
Masturbation is the most common way that women reach orgasm, with 39% saying so… followed by 20% having orgasms during penetrative sex with clitoral stimulation, 15% during penetrative sex without clit stimulation, 12% during oral sex (I would have thought that number would have been higher…), 9% via manual stimulation, 2% with the partner using sex toy, and 3% other……. whatever that may be. Anal?
And even if you think you’re a hot shot getting her off every time, take note: 67% of women fake orgasms to either make their partner happy or end sex sooner…
So How Do We Improve These Stats? Her Clit, Her Mind, and Your Technique
Take note from what the women have said in the survey above… if they aren’t having an orgasm during sex, it’s either because they aren’t getting sufficient or proper clitoral stimulation… and the mind has to be in it.
Before penetrating, get familiar with her clitoris, and how she likes it to be stimulated…
Some women have a very sensitive clit, others can take rough stimulation. If sensitive, you will most likely have to stimulate around the clitoris, or over the clitoral hood, and not stimulate her clit directly… if you do, it may actually cause her pain… and not in the way some women like.
If it can take rough stimulation, she may NEED rough stimulation of the clitoris to orgasm.
Notice how nearly a third of the women surveyed didn’t have “their head in the game”, and that prevented them from having an orgasm.
Making her feel comfortable… taking your time to warm her up with nice, and then more erotic, foreplay… telling her she looks beautiful and (hopefully) really meaning it, while looking at her both with and without her clothes, all of these help “get her in the zone”…
Don’t let up the talk during sex either… get her mind into it, and she’ll be in that 50% who were able to get over the edge.
To show you how strong of a role a woman’s mind plays in her orgasm, check out part of this Strange Sex documentary on TLC, where a woman was able to “think herself to orgasm”… without any physical touch at all
Lastly comes technique…
If you are good with your tongue, then get her close to orgasm orally, and when her hips are rising off the bed in near orgasmic pleasure, THEN you jump in and penetrate… you will have a fresh start, while she will be nearing the finish line (okay, enough with the sport analogies…). This works especially well if you have problems lasting long during sex.
Another thing to remember, especially based on the data above, women know how to get themselves off… if you let her get on top and take the reigns, she’ll “roughly rub” herself off to orgasm in no time… especially if you combine it with dirty talk and extra play to her erogenous zones.
Making a woman orgasm during penetration, with you in control, takes a bit more knowledge. Take into account how she rubs herself off when on top, and try and duplicate the motion. Remember, putting pressure on the clitoris is key. For more on how to make a woman orgasm during vaginal intercourse, see here…
Take this advice and run with it… and let’s up that percentage of women getting off during sex, and lower the percentage of women faking it!
Have a good one!