If it weren’t for losing your erection after orgasm, think of how great you’d be in bed… a never ending erection!
And think about how much fun sex would be… racing towards your orgasm without a fear in the world (rather than holding back)! And having orgasm after orgasm!
For women it’s easy… they don’t have to “maintain” something to have sex. They can go on forever.
But we have a time limit (ejaculation)… and once that time limit is up, our erection is down for the count… But it doesn’t have to be this way. You can learn how to penetrate longer by holding back your ejaculation during orgasm.
This will result in a dry orgasm, which will eliminate refractory period
While not easy to master, once you learn how to have a dry orgasm, then you learn how to penetrate longer… MUCH longer. Eliminate refractory period, and there is no more finish line… you’re running the mile track as many times as you’d like… (and she’s enjoying the run along with you…). This technique is called the male multiple orgasm.
Part of being able to have a dry orgasm involves having a very strong pc muscle… the duration of the pc squeeze… timing of the squeeze is also very important. You may need some guidance to really master the technique every time, but once you have it down, you’ll become a real marathon man a marathon man, able to penetrate longer without an end to your erection.
Difference between Male Multiple Orgasms With Ejaculation And Dry Orgasms
Some men are able to have multiple orgasms with ejaculation, others prefer dry orgasms. There are pluses and minuses to each.
For me, I feel weak if I ejaculate excessively, being that I ejaculate a very large amount (not bragging.. just the way it is… not always a good thing), and it takes a lot out of me.
I’ve always LOOSELY stuck to the Taoist philosophy that saving up ejaculation is good for “masculinity” and strength… so for me, I prefer dry orgasms. I like the motivation and strength I get after conserving semen for a day or two.
(Note: I do make sure to ejaculate a few times every week, though… ejaculation is very important for prostate health — reduces chances of prostate cancer –, helps control stress, and has numerous other mental and physical health benefits…)
And on the other hand, some men don’t get so wiped out after an orgasm, so multiple orgasms with ejaculation work for them.
A small percentage of men naturally have the ability to stay hard after ejaculation, some men can LEARN how to stay hard after ejaculation, others can never get it down… When I purposely trained to do so, I was able to occasionally get the technique down. But didn’t feel right “wasting” so much semen.
For staying hard after ejaculation, you “train” your body to increase it’s NEED for ejaculation… but the tradeoff is you will be ejaculating quite a bit (which may leave you zapped of energy).
On the other hand, with the proper guidance, and some practice, every man can learn how to stay hard after orgasm with the dry orgasm/male multiple orgasm technique… for more info on this particular technique, click here: how to penetrate longer with male multiple orgasms
Have a good one!!
-David Carreras aka Mr. Manpower Mr. Manpower’s Guide to Overall Manhood Enhancement
The Ultimate Sex Guide for Men… “male potency without drugs”
Ever have issues getting an erection when anxious or nervous before sex?
Is this a new issue you’re facing, and never had a problem before?
You grew up masturbating without an issue, or may have already been with a girl or two, and your erection always worked just fine. Getting an erection was something you didn’t need to think about… it just happened, even if you were feeling some anxiety.
And then out of nowhere comes this beautiful girl, whom you want to impress very much (and who is the perfect type for you, attractiveness wise), but when it comes time to perform, the pressure is on, and your penis just doesn’t want to cooperate…
SERIOUS anxiety kicks in, and you are freaking the hell out… you TRY your hardest to get it up, you TELL your erection to GET HARD ALREADY… but it does just the opposite… it shrinks up, and shrinks up even more… and this adds embarrassment to the anxiety, and then before you know it, you’re out of luck… your erection is dead and you know it’s not coming back.
You go home, feeling low. Your self-esteem took a hit… and for the next few days you can think of nothing else but the next time you’re going to have sex.
is your erection going to work?
what is the girl thinking of you?
are you going to need medication to overcome this?
is there a physical problem?
(I know this process so well because it happened to me).
Well the good news is, 1) this sort of sexual anxiety leading to erections issues is EXTREMELY common in men of all ages, especially young men, and 2) once you learn to defeat the problem in your mind, you’ll learn how to get an erection on command EVERY TIME, no matter what, and no matter how anxious or nervous you may be.
I received an email today from a young man facing this mental block to getting an erection. I give him some advice on how to overcome his problem and get his erections back on track:
“So i get hard very easily around my girlfriend and the slightest touch or grind will bring me out however when it comes to the important stage of actually needing to stay hard and penetrate her then i find my penis going soft and bends when i try and go in which means we can never have sex. we are very comfortable with each other and have had proper sex before however it has always been hard to accomplish. we have tried both with and without condoms and still we have the same result.”
Thanks!
Jamie
My reply:
Hello Jamie:
The fact that you can get an erection during foreplay, but not during intercourse, at least shows you that your penis is physically functioning without an issue. You just need to overcome the anxiety that’s blocking you from getting an erection before penetrating.
Sexual performance anxiety sets a wall / block between your mind and your genitals. The idea isn’t to be completely calm, and erase all your anxiety, as that’s nearly impossible (unless you’re on medication), but to work on reducing your anxiety as much as possible, and increasing your mental arousal (“horniness”) as much as possible, so one energy (arousal) overpowers the other (anxiety).
This lowers the wall between your mind and genitals, allowing the flow of arousal that sets off in the mind to reach it’s destination (the penis)… and brings it to life.
I know there’s a lot of advice on overcoming sexual performance anxiety on the internet that doesn’t work, because guys always end up on my site asking for help with this… and I, having been through the problem myself, knows what it takes to get hard even when nervous:
1) admit you’re anxious… it’s fine to be anxious, you’re human. This in of itself reduces the anxiety and lets you work through it
2) concentrate on getting as horny as possible, and don’t think about your erection…. it knows what to do, and will come along on it’s own
3) take it slowwwww…. rushing increases anxiety, taking it slow allows arousal to build
4) do some cardio on a regular basis to improve circulation throughout the body
-David Carreras aka Mr. Manpower Mr. Manpower’s Guide to Overall Manhood Enhancement
The Ultimate Sex Guide for Men… “male potency without drugs” david@mistermanpower.net
Some women REALLY love oral sex… but in my experience, most of the women I’ve been with enjoy penetration even more.
I asked one girlfriend if I wasn’t able to make her orgasm during penetration, would going down on her make up for it? And I received a resounding “NO”.
Women can be mean… but very honest as well.
In the process of unintentionally breaking down your self esteem, women can be some of the best teachers in the bedroom, showing you what you need to really satisfy them, and build solid confidence based off that.
So if you have trouble lasting long during sex, or have no idea how to penetrate a woman properly to make her orgasm, then what do you do?
You learn the following…
How to Penetrate Longer by Controlling Ejaculation
Just as important as learning how to penetrate properly is learning how to penetrate longer. To do this you have two routes: 1) natural/mental, and 2) medical.
There are ways to mentally control ejaculation. Your mental arousal (how horny you are), and the physical urge to ejaculate, are powerfully linked. Keep your mind at ease, and you’ll your ejaculation at bay. But I understand, this is easier said than done, especially when you have a hot, naked girl in front of you, nipples bouncing in your face and she’s riding the hell out of your dick… I get that.
That’s where ejaculation control training exercises come in… these train and sharpen your mind and body connection, so when it comes to actually having sex, you are much better prepared… much like the greatest boxers train hard on their own in the gym before they steps into the ring, and it pays off big time (literally and figuratively).
Then there’s the medical route. SSRI’s, a class of antidepressant that increase serotonin (your happy neurotransmitter), have been shown to correct an issue that causes premature ejaculation in many men. While mental training is often good enough on its own, many men may benefit from using SSRI’s to control ejaculation, especially if these men are ejaculating in under a minute, or before even entering the vagina.
There are downsides to SSRIs, however, so use them as a last resort. They can cause laziness/sleepiness and reduce sex drive… but if your premature ejaculation is very bad, you may consider this tradeoff. At even a very low dose they can work well, so keep that in mind.
(note: I’d try the natural route first though before going medical).
How To Penetrate Properly To Make A Woman Orgasm
Real, orgasm-producing penetration is not like it looks in porn. It’s not just about “banging” her hard and fast (although force and speed of penetration is important, especially when reaching the finish line)… it’s more about the angle at which you penetrate, and how you rub the clitoris on the in- and out-stroke.
A man with a nine inch penis can penetrate a woman for 30 minutes straight, but if he’s not penetrating her properly, she will not get off… meanwhile, a man with a five inch penis can make a woman orgasm in under five minutes, as long as he warmed her up sufficiently before entering, and put the proper pressure on the clitoris while penetrating.
The clitoris is key to her orgasm, and that’s just a tiny nub not even in the vagina…
Ever see how women get themselves off when riding on top? It’s a rough rubbing of the clit against your pelvis, with the penis being more of an afterthought… keep that in mind when penetrating.
Bottom line is…
Whatever it takes for overcoming premature ejaculation, do it. Natural/mental, or medical… whatever it takes for her orgasm, learn… Good sex is one of the building blocks of a solid relationship.
Bad sex can break apart a healthy relationship (I’ve been there), and good sex can keep a crappy relationship together… that’s how important it is. Of course, ideally you want a healthy relationship with good sex…
Mental block erectile dysfunction — an inability to get hard before sex for psychological reasons — strikes men of all ages.
One age group gets hit especially hard, however. This is young men just starting out in their sex lives. Generally these men have spent the early part of their puberty getting erections and masturbating without issue, but then when they start having actual sex, the anxiety blocks their arousal from reaching their erection.
In time, some of these men learn how to overcome the mental ED… for others, it just gets worse.
I myself had problems with getting an erection before sex when I was younger. Sometimes I was drunk, but I can’t totally blame my inability to get hard on the alcohol, as I had many successful sexual experiences while drunk — as long as I was comfortable (Key #1 to Overcoming Mental Block Erectile Dysfunction = Be Comfortable)
Here’s three personal tales of embarrassment and shame thanks to this mental ED. Maybe you’ll relate, if you’re going through a similar issue:
“Why Can’t You Just Hump Me Like That Dog?”
When I was around 22 or 23 I briefly dated this extremely hot Venezuelan girl who was a bartender at Hooters. She was 24, had a very tight body, caramel skin, gorgeous face, dark hair and eyes, thin waist, nice ass, and some nice sized tits…
I met her one day while I was working at a nearby restaurant. She was sitting at the bar with her almost equally hot friend, playing this little poker video game, and downing quite a few drinks over the period of the night.
We caught eyes for a few seconds, but she was so incredibly hot, I felt she was way out of my league. Towards the end of the night, her almost equally hot friend came up to me and said that her friend liked me … long story short, I got the Venezuelan’s number, and by the end of the night, we were making out in the parking lot and I was able to get a pretty good sample of the goods. Regardless of how drunk I was, my dick was working just fine… but I wasn’t putting it in anything. Just a lot of making out and grabbing.
A short time later we went on a date. We went to play pool, and over the course of the night, had quite a bit to drink. After everything was said and done, we ended up at her friend’s house. Up to this point we had just felt on each other; no actual sex yet, though.
Her friend had a dog, that came up to my lady friend and began humping her leg violently… It was weird, but my girl laughed at the dog, but allowed it to continue to do so. I had an irrational feeling of envy along with being entertained by it… but you know, strange feelings creep in when you’re drunk. Also, I couldn’t blame the dog one bit.
After some time, we went inside, and went on the couch. I was so drunk, I figured we’d just sleep it off. Plus, I was anxious. So while laying there, Miss Venezuela unexpectedly pulls my pants and boxers down, and grabs my dick. This was pre-natural penis enlargement days… so my flaccid penis size was quite small. So the embarrassment of her feeling my tiny flaccid size, mixed with anxiety, and drunkenness = failed erection. The anxiety and embarrassment killed my erection more than the tequila shots…
She was pulling on my shriveled up dick when she tells me “Why can’t you just hump me like that dog?”… if she wasn’t holding my penis it probably would have inverted at that point.
If I was envious of the dog before, at this point, I reached a whole ‘nother level of feelings of inadequacy towards it. Long story short, I never got another chance with her. I just wasn’t man enough, or rather, “dog” enough, for her…
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The Night I Was A Scallywag!
Another night, not too long after Miss Venezuela wrote me off, I went to a club “with the boys”.
I had one friend who went out with us named Mike who was pretty slimey at times, but nonetheless, still a good friend (I’ve known him since childhood). He would wait and lay, like a catfish, and see which girls I made impact with and opened up, and then try and move in on them when I would move on to another one. Other than that, a great guy!
So on this night, we got there when the club was still just filling up. This short, blonde Cuban chick with a tight black dress and an extra fat ass was sitting at a corner table with some friends, and she gave me the “fuck glare”… which I politely returned.
I made my way near where she was, and I calmly brought up some conversation with her. We had some small talk, and she appeared quite open to me, and she mentioned something about noticing me when I walked in, out of everybody else who came in. I’m no George Clooney, so hearing these things feels great (too bad it doesn’t happen more often). I returned some compliments and got up to get a drink…
When….
Slimey Mike starts slithering his way over on the couch…
I walk back over and stare at Mike from afar and say “YO MIKE!!”… He guiltily smiles, and slithers himself away… not today, son… this one’s in the bag.
Long story short, me and Miss Chunky Ass get drunk and grind/dance all over the place. At the end of the night, my boys all struck out, and MIKE had to drive me and my prized-possession home. Oh the glory…
When we get to my bedroom, and start fooling around, guess what… my dick doesn’t want to cooperate. I repeat this point again… whisky dick is a great excuse (AND DOES NOT HELP), but it’s your anxiety and mental block that prevents you from getting an erction when inebriated more than the physical effects (which can be overcome, and actually used to your advantage to last longer).
So she starts playing with my dick, and after a while of it not responding, she calls me a “scallywag”… I know she meant it as a tough, mean joke.. and deep down she was probably insulted, but it still bothered me in a way. This stupid three syllable word, which I always associated with pirates, just seemed to fit me at the moment.
I couldn’t get my dick up to please a big bootie biatch in my bed… so I was a scallywag. It just made sense.
I didn’t have the fight in me (nor the self-esteem at the moment) to really defend myself, so I just took it, and went to sleep.
Next day, due to the embarrassment and anxiety, my dick still didn’t work. I got hit with a nasty cycle of mental ED (erectile problems increase anxiety, increased anxiety increases erectile problems). She stuck around though, and a few weeks later I managed to get it up… but I just wished I would have saved all the time and embarrassment of being a scallyway.
Failing To Close The Deal In The Business Room
This case occurred when I was a bit younger than the above-mentioned accounts, and alcohol played no role.
I was seeing this young Puerto-Rican hoochie… big tits, thin waist, fat ass… okay face. But her body was remarkable.
I had failed to perform while on a previous double date, in which me, her and the other couple ended up in a hot tub. My penis started out erect, but when I tried to stick it in, I guess the chlorinated water dried her out, and my penis could not penetrate the fortress that was her labia. I think the hot water cooking my testosterone-makers (testicles) didn’t help my erection all that much either.
So a few days later I’m at her house, hoping to make up for my previous poor performance. We were waiting for her mom to go grocery shopping, so we could have some private time.
The pressure was on… my dick had to work (Key #2 to Overcoming Mental Block Erectile Dysfunction = Don’t Put Pressure On Your Penis)
Some things that raised the anxiety and killed the arousal:
To start with, she lived in a pretty damn ghetto apartment complex
Her mom was a kind of scary looking cock-eyed lady, who’m I couldn’t understand half of what she was saying
She said she couldn’t wait for her mom to leave so we can go into her “business room” – what she called her bedroom
This was the worst of all. Her room was a business room. I would have preferred “play room” (Key #3 to Overcoming Mental Block Erectile Dysfunction = Have Fun With Sex, Don’t Take It Too Seriously)… not to mention the fact that calling it a business room implies she probably “conducted a lot of business”, a.k.a. was probably a slut.
So when her “mother” left to go grocery shopping, we began some foreplay. I began sucking on those beautiful tits, and she rode me/dry humped me with my clothes on. In not too long, I was fully hard. Then she lead me to the business room………
When in there, I pulled my penis out, and rapidly fumbled around with the condom, trying to get it on my penis while it was still erect (Key #4 to Overcoming Mental Block Erectile Dysfunction = TAKE IT SLOOOOOOWWWWWW… rushing kills arousal).
Low and behold, in my rush, my erection/arousal began to flag a little. By the time I rolled the condom on, I had gone down to about 50% erect. She helped line it up for me (the vagina was always lower than you thought it was, right?), and my erection was already kind of weak. I finally got it in there, but it was so soft, it felt like a weak little worm floating around in a massive, heavy ocean of jell-o.
(For some reason, when you’re penis is not fully hard, it feels “overwhelmed” by the vagina, and can cause you to ejaculate sooner)
At least I managed to get it in there.. but I finished in under a minute.
She was disgusted…
She told me to take my business elsewhere…
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How I Learned to Overcome Mental Block ED and Achieve Rock Hard Erections On Command… and Keep Them!
Shitty situations like the above mentioned taught me quite a bit about anxiety before sex, and how to work through it. I learned lessons from all these scenarios and others, and also gathered knowledge from wiser, more experienced guys (when I finally got mature enough to open up and speak about these problems).
Thanks to this, I’ve learned how to overcome this psychological block to getting an erection every time. I’ve got the mind state down necessary to get rock hard erections on command.
Add in some natural penis enlargement exercises (which improve blood flow to the penis), erection strengthening exercises (which strengthen the kegel/pc muscle) and natural libido enhancement activities (which boost testosterone levels, give you stronger sex drive, and improve speed of becoming erect), and I can teach you how to become a penetrating machine with a fool-proof erection.
I’ve reached a point where I can be completely shit drunk, on a one night stand, with a girl I just met, who’s not that attractive, and you can bet on it, I’m getting hard. Rock hard. And after I ejaculate, I’m getting hard again…
For more information on how to strengthen your erections, achieve erections on command, and keep them until you’ve done your job (and done it right), click here:
If it weren’t for losing your erection after orgasm, think of how great you’d be in bed… a never ending erection!
nother night, not too long after Miss Venezuela wrote me off, I went to a club “with the boys”.
